No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
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