oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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