i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
