you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
