Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize