how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
