Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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