I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
