I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
