I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
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