we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
