Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
