theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
