Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
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