just tell him i said nine months
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Randomize
