No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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