Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Randomize
