Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize
