I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
