Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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