so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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