She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
