Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Who did Billy Mays play for?
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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