i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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