Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Randomize
