Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Randomize
