its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
