Pappa wants mamma naked
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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