yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
