Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Randomize