Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
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