Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
This girl is more easily done than said...
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
