Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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