She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Randomize
