Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
