Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
All the doctor said was why
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
