I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
