id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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