Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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