Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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