her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
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