school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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