we have officially lost it.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Randomize
