Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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