Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
