haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
