How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
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