sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
