i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
