Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
We have so much sex to catch up on
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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