She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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